Lately, I was scrolling through an old chat with an old friend and came across this line by me in regards to what I wanted to do after graduation :
My first goal is to write a book and get it published.
I love that goal very much, but it has changed. I realize, that really really gradually, I've shifted. I didn't even notice it. Adults often said, it's okay to change your mind on what you want, and I always thought changing your mind would be painful, like letting go of a dream. But I didn't even feel it happening.
I hate to think that writing books was a fad. It was not. I still love doing it. I still want to do it. But I'm no longer in a hurry to finish or to succeed at it or to prove myself by doing it. I slowly realized I don't care much for traditional publishing or for indie publishing for myself right now. I'm not there yet. I don't think book writing is my career and it's fine. There's a lot more to WRITING than that.
I feel like while the blogging community is awfully helpful and kind and healthy (usually), it's still very easy to fall into the trap of jumping on bandwagons, comparing yourself, and trying to be like other people. I did not know this starting out, and turns out, my blogging journey has as much been one of learning who I really am, as much as learning from others.
I thought being a teenage author was something I wanted - but was it more of a peer pressure sort of thing? Not that any of you put any pressure on me at all - in fact, you all would have told me that all you want me to do is to be myself. But just by the fact that so many of you were pursuing the same goal - I felt like that was somehow THE goal to have.
Lesson learned - the kind of environment you soak yourself in will seep into you, whether you want it to or not. People don't mean to influence you one way or the other, but they still do.
So, I'm grateful for where I was because goals and passions are good (usually), but I'm also grateful for where I've arrived because I've learned something. And that something is that not everyone's goals are, or should be, the same and that's okay. And that your goals - or my goals - don't have to remain the same and that's okay.
So don't force yourself to stay in the same place where you thought you belonged. Give yourself space to grow and discover.
So don't force yourself to stay in the same place where you thought you belonged. Give yourself space to grow and discover.
That's my little talk for the day.
Everyone have a lovely end of the week!
xx lisa
This is very important and I am here for it.
ReplyDeleteAw thank you 💛
DeleteLovely reminder, Lisa! I needed this reminder today. <3
ReplyDeleteI'm so thankful for that 😊😊😊
Delete"So don't force yourself to stay in the same place where you thought you belonged. Give yourself space to grow and discover." < wow. this hit me hard, and beautifully!! this is such a powerful reminder... thank you! <333
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy I could encourage you!! thank you for your sweet comment 💛💛💛
DeleteDefinitely agreeing. As someone that was half on that bandwagon (still kinda am but I have no book xD) it's good to hear that I don't HAVE to be a teenage author. :D Thanks, Lisa xxx
ReplyDeleteoh yeah, the teen author bandwagon 😂 I was so on that!! you're welcome and THANK YOU.
DeleteI agree so much with this post! <333
ReplyDelete:))
DeleteYES TO THIS! I had it on my mind early on to pursue publication as a teen...and then I realized I only wanted that because of peer pressure. Two of my good friends had accomplished it, why not me?
ReplyDeleteWell...because I'm not them. It took a long time to develop my stories anywhere near publication and to grow from writer to decent author. <3
this is so soot on!! it's not everyone's journey, and it takes longer for some people!! thank you for sharing and commenting kara 💛
DeleteBeautiful post <333
ReplyDeleteyou are so kind 😊😊😊
DeleteOh yes, I feel this. I went into college thinking I would never change my major and that major was what I wanted to do and if I switched then I would be betraying "my true heart" but one semester in, I realized that it wasn't what I wanted to do. It was hard, and it was the kind of hard where if you're not absolutely enthralled with every single class then you'd get crushed. I switched it to my current major (practically the same, but a little different) and it just felt right. And I didn't betray myself, and I'm in a better place than I was!
ReplyDeleteAll that to say, I feel this; thank you for writing it. :)
Hanne || losingthebusyness.wordpress.com
THANK YOU FOR SHARING HANNE!! this is so important to remember, and a good reminder that applies many facets life :))
Delete*that it applies
DeleteI understand changing your mind.:)
ReplyDeleteastorydetective.blogspot.com
💛💛💛
DeleteI feel this...I think part of it is just maturing and realizing other things are or have become more important. We all have our own journey.
ReplyDeleteYeah, you're right. I think I was a really idealistic kid with no concept of patience hAhaha but here we are now and this journey will be no less epic ;))
DeleteThis is all part of growing up I think. You lose and regain interest all the time.
ReplyDeleteI still do quite a bit.
So true !! :))
Delete“…just by the fact that so many of you were pursuing the same goal - I felt like that was somehow THE goal to have.” <<<< YES. Coincidently, I have also been through the same “I want to be an author” phase. I was all pretty pumped about writing books like everyone else, and then when the desire faded, it was awkward because I had talked about my book online, and now nothing. Maybe I should muscle through and do it anyway? Can one just “change their mind” about being a fiction writer? These were questions I asked myself, and I think you hit the nail on the head when you said that there’s a lot more to writing than fiction.
ReplyDeleteThis encouraged me a lot, so thank you.
Cheers.
k.
Yeah, I connect to that experience, and I am happy to hear that I'm not alone!! Thanks for commenting :) I'm glad this could encourage you!
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